The realization of missing out on the entire experience of my wedding hits hard.
I won’t get to plan anything. No wedding dress. No shopping with Mom and getting ready with her and Violet.
Dad won’t walk me down the aisle.
My heart constricts painfully in my chest, the ache so sharp I struggle to inhale.
It takes all my strength to keep the tears back.
In one drunken moment, I’ve lost so much.
My voice is hoarse, the sadness seeping through, as I say, “I don’t think I can do this.”
“It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours.” Reaching the building, Luca parks the vehicle turns off the engine, then turns to look at me. “Can you at least try to give it a chance?”
I take off the safety belt as I shake my head. Locking eyes with him, I say, “I’m not trying to be a bitch. There’s just so much I’ll miss out on if I stay married to you.”
For once, he doesn’t get angry with me, and I feel the full force of having his undivided attention on me.
Tingles spread over my skin. My heart beats faster, my breaths growing shallow.
“What will you miss out on?” His tone is patient and even a little caring.
“Everything. The romance. Dating. All the firsts that go hand-in-hand with falling in love. The proposal. Planning the wedding with my mom. Having my dad walk me down the aisle. Violet being my bridesmaid. The reception.” I sigh, my shoulders dropping. “And so much more. The list is endless.”
He stares at me for a moment, then reaches for my hand. Just like earlier, there’s a spark when his fingers wrap around mine.
“You can still have it all.”
My eyes drift over his handsome face. “You’ll agree to an annulment?”
Yes, I love him, but I’m not willing to torture myself by staying in a marriage where he doesn’t love me. In a perfect world, Luca would fall head over heels for me, he’d romance the ever-loving shit out of me, and we’d live happily ever after.
But the real world is far from perfect, and I’m starting to suffer from all the whiplash because part of me is hanging on to the mustard seed of hope that Luca will suddenly fall for me, while the other half knows it will never happen.
“No,” he answers, unwilling to see things from my point of view.
I start to pull my hand free from his, but he tightens his hold and says, “We can date over the next six months. I’ll propose to you, and we’ll have a wedding with our friends and families.”
Frustration slithers through my chest. “You don’t get it. I don’t want a pretend marriage, Luca.”
“I already said this marriage will be real in every way.” He lets go of my hand and shoves the driver’s side door open.
I have zero appetite, and the last thing I want to do right now is have dinner. Climbing out of the car, I slam the door shut, my eyes burning on Luca as he stalks around the front of the G-Wagon.
His features are tight with anger, his irises dark as night.
“You want romance, I’ll give you fucking romance,” he mutters right before his arm wraps around my lower back, and my body’s yanked flush with his.
My hands quickly find his shoulders, then I’m stunned out of my mind as his head lowers. When I feel his breath on my lips, his eyes bore into mine with so much intensity I forget how to breathe.
Sweet Jesus.
Luca lifts his other hand and weaves his fingers into my hair, and the moment is so damn intense I can’t even move as he closes the last of the distance and claims my mouth.
I swear the ground quakes beneath my feet. My thoughts and emotions instantly spiral into a chaotic mess.
There’s not a single drop of willpower in me to push him away. Instead, my lips part, and the moment his tongue strokes hard against mine, the ground gives way beneath me, and I fall into everything he makes me feel.
There’s only the scent of his masculine aftershave, the feel of his lips, the sound of our breaths.
I’ve spent endless nights dreaming about Luca kissing me. Nothing prepared me for the real thing.
A hard tremor rakes my body, and my heart threatens to beat right out of my chest.
God, surely he feels the connection between us?
He kisses me with so much dominance and passion I can’t keep up. His lips knead mine, his tongue lashes, and his teeth tug, drawing a moan from me.
All I can do is hold onto his shoulders as he possesses me in a way I’ve never been possessed.
His arm becomes a steel band around my lower back while his fingers fist in my hair.
I melt until I’m nothing more than clay in his hands.
When he ends the kiss and pulls back slightly, I keep my eyes closed. My breaths are embarrassingly fast, my heart still pounding a mile a minute.
“Look at me,” Luca demands with a hoarse voice.
Slowly my lashes lift until I’m staring into his darkened eyes.
“One way or another, we’re going to make this work.”
With my emotions all over the place, I press close to him again and wrap my arms around his neck. When he returns the hug, I squeeze my eyes shut, working to regain my equilibrium.
“I just need a moment,” I whisper against his neck.
“We can stand here all night, baby.” He presses a kiss to my shoulder.
The term of endearment makes goosebumps erupt over my skin, and I hold him tighter.
Please, God. Let this man fall in love with me. I beg you.
Luca starts to rub my back, and it’s so comforting, it eases some of the tension in me.
Pulling back, I say, “I’m good. Let’s have dinner.”
Luca takes my hand and leads me toward the establishment while I try to come to terms with the fact that he just rocked my entire world with a single kiss.
Dear God, I’m in so much trouble.
