Shadow shoved her head out the window as Nash guided his SUV up the mountain roads. Her tongue lolled out of her mouth, and she let out a bark.
“I think someone’s happy,” my dad said.
I turned in the back seat, taking Shadow and giving her a rub. “It’s good for her to get out a little more. Wren had someone walking her in the middle of her shifts, but Shadow has a lot of energy.”
Dad surveyed me from the front passenger seat. “You and Wren are getting into a rhythm.”
It wasn’t a question, but it held a gentle probe. My hackles didn’t rise like they would’ve just days ago. What I had told Wren was true—I loved that she’d had my family for all the years I wasn’t here and that they were protective of her. That they’d developed a true closeness.
“It’s going to take time, but we’re getting there.”
He nodded but didn’t look away. “I’m sorry if how I acted when you came home made you feel like I didn’t believe in you. I love both of you, and there’s nothing I want more than seeing you happy.”
Instead of hiding behind a mask of indifference, I kept my walls down. I let my dad see everything I normally hid with practiced ease. I let the regret and grief rise to the surface. The pain and self-torture. “I love her, Dad. I never stopped. I really did think I was doing the right thing.”
He twisted farther in his seat. “I know that, Holt. I never thought you left for selfish reasons. But relationships are hard. They’re work. You have to stick it out even when it seems like running would be easier on everyone.”
A muscle flickered in my jaw.
“He’s not running, Dad,” Nash said from the driver’s seat. “He needed time to get his head on straight. Living without Wren has taught him more than any of your lectures ever could.”
I studied my brother. He was typically so easygoing, but there was a tension in him now: the way his knuckles bleached white around the wheel, the way his jaw locked tight. And something in his expression said that he knew about regret all too well.
“He’s right.” I looked at Dad. “I get that you might have reservations. But they aren’t going to stop me. I know the agony of living without Wren, of falling asleep thinking about her every night. Of wondering where she is and if she’s safe. Happy. Of imagining her falling in love with someone who isn’t me. Starting a family.”
The brutal pain of all those nights ripped through me. Wren and I had loved dreaming about our future. Thinking up names for our kids. She’d wanted to meet each of them before settling on one because their little personalities would shine through. We’d loved drawing up plans for our home. She’d demanded a front porch and swing that could be a couch or bed. Coming up with traditions that would be ours alone: Wren wanted a scavenger hunt for every Easter, and heart-shaped pancakes on Valentine’s Day. Every night at dinner we would share our highs and lows.
My dad’s face paled. “Holt—”
I held up a hand. “I’m not trying to make you feel guilty. I just need you to understand. There’s no torture I wouldn’t live through for her. Because even in that, I thought it was right.”
“But now you know it isn’t,” he said quietly.
“I stole Wren’s choice from her. Not just that, I took her voice. I’ll hate myself for it for the rest of my days, but I’ll never do it again. Wren is the strongest woman I’ve ever known. And for some reason, she loves me.”
“Probably took a hard hit to the head as a baby. It scrambled her good sense,” Nash muttered.
I grinned, smacking the back of his head. “I think you were dropped on the head as a baby.”
“I know he was,” Dad shot back.
Nash scowled at him. “Rude.”
A little of the grin slipped from my face as I met Dad’s gaze. “I’m never leaving. Not unless she asks me to. And even then, I’d never go far. She has my heart. My soul. Everything that’s good in me. She’s where I feel peace.”
Dad’s eyes shone with unshed tears. “That’s all I could ever hope to hear. All I could want for her. All I could want for you.”
I felt the raw truth in his words. And I didn’t blame him for the doubt he’d had. Or for wanting to protect Wren—and me. My need to shield the people I cared about had come from my dad. He’d ingrained it in all his kids without even meaning to.
“Good God, I can’t take much more of this mushy lovefest,” Nash moaned. “I’d almost rather see you and Little Williams making out.”
Dad choked on a laugh. “We’ve really traumatized him today, haven’t we?”
I leaned forward, clamping my hands on Nash’s shoulders, and giving him a shake. “It’s good for you. Gotta work on that emotional intelligence.”
Nash cast an affronted look in the rearview mirror. “I have plenty of emotional intelligence, thank you very much.”
Dad hid his laugh behind a cough. “Sure, you do.”
“How about when he hooked up with Grae and Wren’s friend sophomore year?” I said with a grin.
Dad shook his head. “That poor girl.”
Nash gaped at us. “Poor girl? What about poor me? After one kiss, she made a photo collage of us by pasting my head on other people’s bodies. She basically stalked me!”
I couldn’t hold in my laughter now. The girl hadn’t been shy about showing her affections, but a person would’ve had to be blind not to see that she was in love with Nash before he even looked her way. She’d gone to every basketball game, painted his number on her T-shirts, brought him brownies for good luck. It was sweet, but Nash was not a commitment kind of guy, especially not in high school.
The breakup did not go well.
Dad grinned. “You inherited your old man’s charm. It’s a blessing and a curse.”
Nash scoffed. “Katie was off her rocker. I’m pretty sure she’s the one who slashed Maddie’s tires.”
My eyes widened. “Seriously?”
He nodded, the scowl deepening on his face. “What is wrong with people?”
“Broken hearts can lead us all to stupid decisions.” Dad’s lips twitched. “I don’t think Grae ever forgave you for costing her a friend.” He glanced at me. “It’s a miracle she didn’t stand in Holt and Wren’s way.”
Because Grae knew how I felt about Wren. Knew that I’d been in love with her forever. Before I even recognized the emotion, our friendship slipping into more, into everything, so seamlessly it was as easy as breathing. I’d dated before Wren and I got together, but it had never felt right, and it had taken that wrong to make me realize what was right in front of me.
“Holt always was her favorite,” Nash grumbled as he pulled into the parking lot at the trailhead.
I chuckled. “I don’t know about favorite, but I didn’t shamelessly flirt with all her friends.”
“That’s because you don’t have game.”
“It’s because there’s only one girl who has ever felt right.”
Something passed over Nash’s face, but he hid it quickly with a grin. “So, what you’re saying is that you’ve basically been whipped since birth.”
I shrugged, opening my door. “Happily.”
Nash gagged, but my dad gave me an attaboy.
Grabbing Shadow’s leash, I motioned for her to follow me out of the SUV. “Do you have maps of the area that we can go over?”
Nash nodded. “In the trunk.”
I moved around to the back hatch and opened it. There was a cylinder that I knew housed what we needed. It took me a minute to find what I was looking for. “Tell me the range of coordinates her parents gave.”
Nash leaned over my shoulder. “Law talked to her dad, and he said she could be anywhere from Mystic Springs to Sage Hollow.”
I frowned as I looked at the map. “That’s a hell of a range. Even if they hadn’t spoken to her in a week, they should have been able to narrow it down more than that.”
Nash shrugged. “Maybe she was planning to stop along the way for a couple of nights. There are some beautiful sights around there.”
Dad moved in at my other side, running his finger along the path. “Holt’s right. We need to see if the parents can narrow it down a little more.”
I pulled my sat phone from my pocket and hit Lawson’s contact. He answered on the second ring. “Everything okay?”
“I guess we’re back to normal if that’s how you’re answering the phone.”
Lawson huffed out a breath. “I could use some normal around here.”
Guilt gnawed at me. He’d been through the wringer lately, working crazy hours and still being there for his boys. “We’ll be there before too long.”
“I know. Did you make it to the trailhead?”
“We’re here, but I have a question.”
Lawson’s chair squeaked as he shifted. “Sure.”
“The range of coordinates the parents gave is pretty damn broad. Can you call them and see if they can narrow it down at all? I’m worried we’re wasting manpower in areas we won’t find her.”
Typing came across the line and then a muffled curse. “My head is in a million places. I should’ve thought about how much ground that would be to cover.”
“Don’t sweat it.”
“Hold on. Let me conference you in with them.”
“Perfect.” I grabbed my pack, pulling out a small notebook and pencil.
Lawson hit a few keys on his phone, each one letting out a beep. A second later, I heard ringing, and then an automated voice took over. “The number you have called is no longer in service.”
Lawson disconnected the third line. “I must’ve misdialed.” He punched in the number again. A single ring and the same message came across the line.
“Maybe I wrote the number down wrong. Let me pull up the dispatch log.” The sound of typing filled the air. “No, I’ve got it right. Who gives a wrong number when their kid is missing?”
The blood drained from my body, replaced by ice sliding through my veins. God, I hoped my instincts were wrong and that my paranoia had taken over and was running away with my good sense. But the overwhelming sense of dread pooling in my gut was too much to take.
“Law, get officers to Wren’s house right now.”
“What?” he asked, confusion filling his voice.
“Just do it,” I barked. “If you wanted me out here, away from Wren, what would you do?”
Lawson went silent for a beat. “Get the SAR team called out.”
That and my family were the only things that could take me away from Wren.
Nash’s hand tightened on his keys. “Who would want to get you away from Wren? Joe Sullivan is still in custody.”
But what if we hadn’t caught the right guy? Then Wren was all alone. Unprotected.
