I wake up at five AM to an alarm beeping frantically. I groan, rolling over as the two warm bodies I’m sandwiched between start to shift.
I frown. Two? That’s not right, is it? I distinctly remember only shagging one man last night.
I force my eyes open. “Jack?” I whisper, watching the blonde man roll out of bed, rubbing his stubbled jaw. “When did you get here?”
He smiles down at me, bending to kiss my cheek. “Heard you guys come back in,” he says, in a raspy, sexy morning voice. “And I missed you.” He tries to straighten, but I grab his hand, trying to tug him back onto the mattress.
“Come back. Stay.”
“I can’t, honey. Cy and I are going up to Edinburgh, remember?” He yawns massively, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.
I groan, flopping down onto the pillows. Two deep laughs rumble over my head.
“Jesus,” Jack mutters, “she looks wrecked. What the Hell did you do to her?”
“Shagged her,” Cyrus says. I hear the hiss of a deodorant can. “What do girls look like after you sleep with them?”
“Cyrus danced for me,” I say dreamily. “Then he ate me out upside down.”
Jack chuckles. “I see.” He brushes my hair out of my face, trailing his fingers down my cheek. “Go back to sleep, Beth. We’ll see you on Monday.”
I want to sit up and kiss them both goodbye, but my eyes are too heavy, so I just nod. “Kay,” I mumble, mashing my face in the pillow. “Have a good trip.”
I feel two warm mouths kiss my cheeks, and then I’m out again.
I wake up naturally just before eight, and lie in Cyrus’s empty bed, looking around me sleepily. With the sunlight sifting through the window, I can finally see the inside of his room. It’s pretty; his sheets are deep red and silky, his lampshade is made of orange glass, and he has a big gold-framed mirror opposite his bed. His blinds are saffron-coloured and translucent, turning the morning sunbeams into warm yellow light. The whole effect is sultry and exotic.
A soft baby’s cry sounds from somewhere in the flat, and I sigh, sliding out of the bed and tugging the silky covers back into place. My rumpled red dress lies on the floor, and I grimace as I wriggle back into it. I may as well get my walk of shame over with. I can’t hide in here all day.
I look in the mirror and wince at my bedraggled appearance, then use some tissues and water to wipe off the makeup smeared around my face. It doesn’t help much. I still look like a total wreck.
I sigh, setting my shoulders, and head out into the living room. Sebastian is awkwardly carrying Cami out of the bathroom, his hair mussed around his face. He pulls up short when he sees me. “Beth?” He asks incredulously. “Why are you here?”
“I…” I clear my throat. “Cyrus… invited me to stay the night.”
He blinks a few times, staring at me as if he’s not sure I’m real. “Oh,” he says slowly.
My cheeks burn. I push my chin up. “I understand if… that poses an issue,” I say levelly. “If you want to find someone else—”
“No, no,” he says, looking slightly stunned. “That’s fine. I knew he was interested in you.” He looks down at Cami. She pouts up at him sulkily. “Are you staying?” He asks hopefully.
“I’m taking the weekend off,” I remind him, heading to the door and slipping on my heels. “I put some homemade baby food in the fridge. Her feeding and nap schedules are on the kitchen table, and her tummy time mat is folded on top of the toy box.”
He nods, rubbing the back of his neck. I don’t know if it’s because he’s just woken up, but the man looks completely out-of-sorts. Like he barely knows what’s going on.
I sigh. After last night, I really don’t want to offer to stay on call all weekend; but since the other two will be gone, I know he might struggle to look after Cami alone. “Look, if you need help—”
“If I need help, I will call a different nanny,” he cuts me off. “There won’t be any repeats of last night.” He meets my eyes, his face sincere. “It was rude to barge in on you like that. I apologise.”
Something twists in my stomach. This is the third time he’s apologised to me. I wish he’d stop. It’s making being firm with him much more difficult.
“Alright. Good, then.” I look down at Cami. “See you Monday, jellybean.”
She reaches after me, leaning out of Seb’s arms. I blow her a kiss, give Sebastian one last awkward nod, and then turn to leave.
The weekend passes slowly. I’ve gotten used to my days being jam-packed. With Cyrus and Jack gone, and no adorable babies to cuddle, I feel lonely and useless. I spend most of my time lazing around in bed, watching Netflix and waiting for Monday to roll around again. Cyrus and Jack text me a few times: mostly photo messages of them at the convention, getting food or hanging out at the different stalls. Cy sends me a video of Jack wearing a VR headset, beating up the air with a pair of nunchucks, and I almost piss myself laughing.
I’m really glad that they’re taking the time to talk to me. I wasn’t sure what would happen after we all slept together. I thought it might be awkward. But they’re sweet and flirty and charming in their texts, and I can’t help smiling like an idiot every time a notification pops up on my screen. Benny’s right—I have been seriously missing out, thanks to my relationship ban. If this is what casual dating is like, then I am a big, big fan.
On Sunday evening, I’m curled up in bed, eating ice cream and watching a bootleg performance of Wicked when my phone rings. I glance at it. Sebastian’s number. I automatically go to answer the call, then pull my hand back.
Ignore it, a voice says in the back of my mind. It’s your day off. Stop rolling over for him whenever he talks to you. He said he’d call someone else if he needed help.
But this isn’t just about him and me, it’s about Cami. Sighing, I pick up the phone. “Yes?”
“Come here,” Sebastian rasps. “I need you.”
I grit my teeth. For God’s sake. How hard would it be to say, ‘sorry to disturb you, can you come and help me?’ Why does it always have to be a bloody order? Would a ‘please’ kill him?
“Do you, now?” I ask drily.
He doesn’t respond. I can hear Cami wailing in the background. She sounds distraught. “Jesus. Have you tried burping her?”
“Come here,” he repeats, his breath shaky against the receiver. “Now.”
My grip on the phone tightens. “We’ve been over this. These aren’t work hours. You don’t get to order me around.”
There’s a long pause. Cami’s sobbing continues, getting even louder.
“Please,” he gets out eventually. His voice has dropped to a whisper. “Please. I wouldn’t be calling you if I thought I could look after her myself. I—I can’t look after her properly right now. She needs to be safe. Please come.”
I sit up, alarm running through me. “What do you mean, she needs to be safe? Sebastian, why isn’t she safe?”
He doesn’t respond. Cami’s cries reach a screaming pitch, and I swear, ending the call and jamming the phone in my pocket.
